To live our life, we need to meet our physical and mental requirements timely and appropriately. If we are hungry, we need food. Similarly, we need proper clothing and shelter also. The next need what humans require is their physical need of sex.
Sex is an essential part of life. If you remove sex from life you will find that life becomes a big void. If you take sex in the right way, it could enrich your life the way nothing else can. A lot of people bring their sex life out of the bedroom than one might think. Sex is not as closeted as it is made out to be. Mull over this – a bad sexual episode makes the boss grumpy and he begins biting everyone’s head off at work. Someone doesn’t get laid the previous night despite being extremely horny and they bring their libido to work. On the other hand, someone had a great sexual night and they are in highest spirits today. If that is not bringing sex out of the bedroom, what is it?
All of us, in some or the other measure, bring our sex lives out of our bedrooms. People who know us can easily tell the difference. How many times have our friends asked us, “Hey Joe, you are in high spirits today man! What happened last night?” Even though just casual banter, it means something important. It means that people equate good sex with good living.
If the Almighty hadn’t ordained sex to play such an important part of our life, He would not have made it so important to carry the species forward. But for us, on an individual level, sex is essential because it is one of the primary needs for life. I am not saying that we have to be libidinous all the time, but we do need to feel secure about it. It is important for us to realize that we have access to fulfill our sexual needs. That is why we have institutionalized marriage. Marriage means a lot of other important things – probably much more important too – but it also means sexual security. At the risk of sounding carnal, it can be said that marriage means not having to go hunting for sexual partners anymore. This is essential in keeping life optimal.
However, the first step to really meaningful sex is love. That is a whole different story in itself. But if you can find someone with whom you can build an emotional equation and not just a physical one, then you will find that your life becomes more fulfilling.
Have a Hobby
An idle mind is a devil’s workshop. If you want to make your life more meaningful, one of the ways to do it is to fill the voids. Fill the emptiness that exists in it. When you make your life more productive, automatically your life gains more meaning.
The best way to go about that is to have a hobby. A hobby is something that you like to do. It won’t give you money, but it can give you something more important. It gives you mental peace. It makes you realize that you can get something more out of your life than just what your work can give you. It makes you feel good about yourself because you know you are doing something creative.
So what is it that really drives you? Here are some common hobby ideas that can enrich your life.
Gardening is considered a great hobby and it is ecologically beneficial too. But what is most significant about it is that it gives you a feeling that you can “create” life. When you see your saplings grow, the feeling they can create in your mind is nonpareil. Many people who devote themselves to gardening do so because it teaches them to appreciate life in a better way.
A lot of people enjoy traveling. Visiting different places, eating different foods, understanding how people in different parts of the world live differently, picking up their languages and dialects, learning about their cultures and customs is something that can really enrich your mind. A person who has traveled a lot has improved the mind with various experiences and will have a lot of stories to tell.
Got a skill with the paintbrush? Then probably painting will be more in your line. Even here, you could try your hand at nature painting, because this is an art that can really make you appreciate even the smallest things in nature. You realize everything that exists in the world around you and you can become happier about your own life too.
Reading opens up the mind. It makes you more creative; it makes you imagine better. You learn how to see beyond the trivial things that people usually think about. You begin to see the larger picture. The more well-read a person is, the more enriched in mind he or she will be.
In short, any hobby that has something to teach you or helps you to see things differently can be a great idea for a hobby. These hobbies help you to look beyond your normal survival instinct and make you a much better person, who is living optimally.
It Is Not Just about the Present.
Optimal living is not just for today. Make sure that you live in happiness for as long as you are here. A very lethal mistake that we make in the way of our achieving happiness is that we think only about the present. We think that we have something today that makes us happy and that’s just about it. We don’t consciously strive to build securities for tomorrow. This is where we fail.
If we live in the knowledge that our future is not protected, we will certainly not be able to make the most of today. We will forever be living in the shadow of an uncertain tomorrow and that could hamper our present like nothing else can.
You must have a good insurance plan that will protect your future. You might find various options around you, but you need to take some time out from your busy present life and find a plan that bests suits your purposes. Once you have such a plan, make sure you keep it up. Though you cannot see the fruits of this plan currently, tomorrow it will come in handy. You cannot say when an emergency might strike.
No one can predict what will happen tomorrow. But if we think that we have done our best to secure our future, our lives will be happier today as well.
It is not just about monetary security, though. We also have to invest in relationships. Giving love to everyone around us is actually a way of securing our future. When we spread this love, we are also building their trust and companionship forever. Tomorrow, when we could be lonely, these people could be of great value to us. They could make our lives better than they would normally be.
The same applies for friendships. It is quite unwise to treat everyone around in a surly manner. We must not paint ourselves in a corner while everyone else is outside. The thing we must actually do is to reach out to as many people as we can. Everyone can be a potential friend for life.
What we spoke about financial security applies to relationships as well. When you live in the knowledge that you have done your best for your family and friends, you can sleep better at night because you know they will stand for you too. You may not have helped them out selfishly, but this is an aftereffect that you cannot shake yourself from.
Do You Fully Enjoy Your Life Today?
What about right now? Do you think you are living an optimal life? Is Your Life Optimal Today? Do you go to bed each night scared about waking up tomorrow? Or do you go to bed, completely relaxed and with a smile on your face, eager to wake up in the morning and face the new day?
This is the biggest indicator of how optimal your life is. Those few minutes between hitting the bed and falling asleep are when we assess our lives. These are the times when we think how far we have come and where we are headed. If these few minutes can put us into careless slumber, our lives are quite well-placed. But if they only make you toss and turn and reach out for the jug of water a zillion times, then there’s something you need to take stock of.
An optimal life is not about how much money you have. It is about how content you are. You might have less, but if it is enough to meet your needs, then you are doing well. It is only dissatisfaction that makes you depressed; whether you are earning more or less doesn’t matter.
So ask yourself these questions:-
- Am I contented with my life today?
- Am I happy with the way my family treats me?
- Do I think I have some good friends?
- Am I insecure about money and the future?
- Am I happy with my job?
- Am I satisfied with my sex life?
If your answer to these questions has been affirmative, your life is very close to being optimal. There might be some areas that you still need to work on. If such areas exist, it is a good idea to start working on them right away so that you take your life in a better direction than it is now. Most importantly, remember that it is not your life that should control you; it is you who should control your life. When you do that, you will see that you are happier with the way your life has headed.
Putting Your Self in Your Life
You are most important to you. It is your life that we are speaking about. There will be times in your life when you will begin to give more importance to other people and forget about yourself. This will happen when you first fall in love, have a first child, etc. These people become the center of your attraction. You forget that you are an individual too.
Most problems in life stem from this. Instead, if you place yourself in the equation too, life becomes much better. When doing something for your loved one, do spare a moment and think how happy that makes you. When you get a gift for him or her, wait awhile and think of the smile on your face too. When you get a great school for your child, think about your own pride too. When you think about yourself, you give emphasis upon yourself as well. You are not just thinking about people around you, but you are thinking about yourself as well.
Why is this important? The most important benefit of thinking about yourself is that you would want to repeat that action. When you remember how happy it made you when you give a present to your spouse, you will want to give it again. When you remember how happy it made you to take your child to the amusement park, you will do that again quite soon.
Because you are giving your loved ones the things that they like, your relationships will keep improving. Your inner thought is to make yourself happy, but you are helping everyone around too.
Relationships dwindle over the ages. Your love for people might also diminish. Children outgrow you and the attachment wears down. Most romantic relationships are good for only a few years. When such things begin happening, we do not bother ourselves with the small things we once did to keep the relationships happy.
But one relationship will never dwindle. And that is your relationship with yourself. You will always want to see yourself happy. And because you remember that giving your loved ones things made you happy, you will do that again. This will help you keep the flame of the relationships burning bright.
However, only you know the secret – you are doing things as much for yourself as you are doing for them. In any case, it keeps you happier. It makes your life optimal and worth living. Living an optimal life is entirely in your hands. You have to shape it in such a way that it gives you what you are looking for. You have to take care of it. If you ignored so far, the new year 2011 is opening up before you to correct your process of living.
Wishing You Happy New Year!
Be Happy – You Must Meet Your Physical Needs Timely To Live Optimally.