3 Friends with Benefits Rules for Girls : Everyone has a different way that they define their perfect relationship. For some it is one of commitment, loyalty, and hope of progression. Many girls need to know that their significant other only has eyes for them and that their relationship is going somewhere. But a committed and serious relationship isn’t for everyone and it might not be what you’re looking for at this time of your life.
Maybe you just want to have a little fun with no strings attached. Friends with benefits implies that you are essentially engaging in a hookup without expectations of something more meaningful coming out of it. It can be a liberating way for you to explore and figure out exactly what you’re looking for without having to worry about the drama and complications that often come with serious relationships. However, if this is the type of situation that you’re looking for, there are a few rules you need to keep in mind to ensure things don’t get messy.
Be Clear and Upfront About What You Want
A friends with benefits scenario only works when both parties are on the same page. If you tell your partner that you only want the physical aspect of a relationship without the commitment, then you can’t get your hopes up for any more than that. Transparency from both sides is key to ensure that the intention behind the relationship is mutual.
The best time to discuss this is not after you’ve already been seeing your partner for awhile. At this point, significant feelings could have already been established and it may be hard to backtrack.
Rather, lay it all out there before engaging in any intimate physical activity with your partner. Let them know that you aren’t looking to be in a committed relationship and your feelings regarding the matter aren’t going to change. Most importantly, don’t let the conversation be one sided! Ask your partner for his input and ensure he shares your same feelings.
Check In to Ensure You’re Both Still on the Same Page
The tricky thing about friends with benefits and no strings attached relationships is that sometimes feelings develop when you least expect them to. While you may have originally planned to just have fun without any intention of getting serious, it’s possible that you will later experience real feelings for the other person and vice versa. Check in frequently with your partner to ensure you’re both still on the same page in terms of expectations.
If you find yourself secretly hoping that something more will come out of the situation, you need to inform your partner that your feelings have changed. Maybe he too will admit that he’s opening up to the idea of a real relationship. If this is not the case, this is your chance to cut ties before your feelings continue to develop further and you risk a greater chance of heartbreak.
Don’t Expect an Emotional Aspect of a Physical Relationship
If you’ve made it clear to your partner that you’re only looking to be friends with benefits, you can’t expect him to act like your boyfriend. He’s likely not going to be the person to call to help you move into your new apartment or let your dog out for you when you go on vacation. He’s also probably not going to be too interested in sharing personal thoughts or emotions with you, so don’t be surprised if he’s not opening up in that regard. Those are things that typically only happen in the case of a committed and mutual relationship.
As far as communication, in general it will be pretty minimal. For example, a text exchange might be focused solely on when and where you’re going to meet for your next hookup. Of course, this varies from relationship to relationship and depends on how close you two really are as friends. However, if your relationship is truly just the physical, you’ll probably not be having too many heart to heart chats.
Because of this, remind yourself why you opted for a friends with benefits or a casual hookups relationship in the first place. If you find yourself wishing your partner behaved more like a boyfriend, then it may be time to reassess whether the situation is still benefiting you and your life.
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